"Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire" - Review

Years after the events of the 1980s, and a few years after a new "generation" of pest controllers dealt with the plot once again; a band of plucky Studio Executives (Gil Kenan, Jason Blumenfeld and Jason Reitman) band together in order to squeeze blood from a stone where the very idea of nostalgia and corporate expansion of it, is antithetical to the original film. I don't even like the first one that much!

A soulless source of corporate drivel, fuelled excessively by nostalgia (for a project that was, basically, just about greedy 80s pest controllers accidentally saving the world with the timing of their grift) painting its protagonists as heroes for the sole reason that they are the ones the audience remembers.
Now taking place in the modern day after an especially cynical, "tug at the heartstrings because one of the cast is dead, and let's waste Bob Gunton" legacy sequel, the film struggles to justify its own existence. The plot is a carbon copy of the first film (an evil, unspecified entity seeks to enthrall all ghosts and take over the world, and an ordinary guy civilian must step up to the plate in the interim, even being called "The Fire Master" this time around) but peppered with a dozen or so ideas to pretend as if it was written, and to give screentime to its myriad of hastily sketched characters rather than arcs. Our protagonists are essentially merely present for proceedings, Carrie Coon receiving about 8 lines and having no arc beyond the (quite justifiable) "Daughter, stay at home because you are 15, and thus it is illegal for you to work with us"; Paul Rudd gets a scene and a half about taking on the mantle of stepfather (almost certainly a Gil Kenan addition, watch "Monster House" instead) before just having a "Wow she called me dad!" line at the end, no payoff, just "huh, guess that's done!"; Finn Wolfhard is here, and sits in the basement. Slimer is there. Also, Finn Wolfhard wants to drive the car in the opening scene. Then in the final scene Carrie Coon throws Finn Wolfhard the keys. Way to use Finn Wolfhard guys...
McKenna Grace almost gets the throughline and story: she has a relationship with a burned up ghost (Emily Alyn Lynd, really relishing her "Nora Zehetner" energy, and making me wish for more Nora Zehetner movies, and wanting to watch "Doctor Sleep" again), which could be sweet and touching and gentle in the right hands, and given room to breathe, but like all things here it is underwritten, and serves only to have an "oh no! She was using her, and is conflicted!" cursory reveal halfway through, removing tension, stakes, drama and comedy.
Slimer is in it.
Dan Akroyd and Ernie Hudson get, again, perfunctory lines about "maybe we're old..." but they go nowehere, and the introduction of a ghost research lab serves entirely to justify not just Ernie Hudson but the rest of the supporting cast, and maybe the threadbare plot.
Bill Murray says things. I guess they're funny? I never really got the Bill Murray hype, he has done some good movies, and some bad movies.
Janine the secretary wears a Ghostbuster uniform! That's cool, right guys? That's a joke! That's an arc, right? Right?
Celeste O'Connor, the token non-binary actor and the token black actor in the new cast, is present. They are there, they are in the lab, they technically are in the film. Once again, Hollywood wastes the excellent Celeste O'Connor, so I suppose they are at least keeping to tradition.
Kumail Nanjani threatens to make the film funny, as a lovable waster who must save the world after pawning off his grandmother's Ghost Guardian Gear for 50 bucks, that could have been fun. He got a few smirks out of me.
And I must give my sincere thanks to James Acaster: not just in general, he's bloody brilliant, but for getting the token laugh, the only actual joke in this film.

"It" Review - From the Vaults

Having just gotten back from "It", I can safely say that it is excellent, not just as a horror movie, but as an adaptation of the book. It captures the themes, characters and pants-shitting terror of the only book to have ever spooked the bollocks off me. It's an absolute blast, and if you don't want spoilers, I'd stop reading here.

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Okay, if you're sure!

The time-shift to the 80s works in the film's favour, they put a lot of effort into it without ramming it down your throat, so that it doesn't just feel like a "Stranger Things" parody (despite the appearance of Finn Wolfhard, more on him in a bit) and actually gives characters room to breathe and evolve. As an added bonus, when they are adults, it means that they won't be fighting the creature with zimmer-frames, knitted jumpers and copies of Glen Miller tapes. 

They focus on the first part of the story, the kids, and adapt the tale in their own way whilst still honouring and adding touches to the source material. Case in point: the street names are exactly the same as in the book, there's a Lego turtle by Georgie's bed, the statue of Paul Bunyan is seen, some pieces of dialogue are verbatim from the novel, and there's even a blink-and-you'll-miss-it cameo by Tim Curry's version of that fucking clown. 

The chief rule of horror movies is usually not to show the villain/monster, but here it works BECAUSE they circumvent that rule. Some of the known ones are there (Georgie chasing his boat, Eddie encountering the Leper) but some are changed for the better or equal effect: Stan's encounter with the statue is removed, thank Christ, and replaced with one of the most horrifying pieces of artwork I have ever seen, in a sequence which makes me want to burn the concept of paintings themselves, and all buildings just to be safe; Mike's backstory is edited, mostly for the better and to remove the references to "The Shining", and instead of the bird in the pipe (one of my favourite pieces from the novel of batshit insanity) we get something... darker but nonetheless effective. 

The characters are done incredibly well. Each of the seven kids are sketched out fully and played by genuinely good child actors, which is the thing which would have made or broken this film. The standout, as I thought he would be, is Richie Tozier, my second favourite character from the novel, who allows you to laugh and rest easy after sequences of existential dread and wiping the urine off your seat. Ben is still prevalent, but sidelined after a while in favour of Bill and Beverly, which streamlines it somewhat, and makes it no longer "The Adventures of 3 Kids Beginning with B, and Some Other Assholes" as was in the book. 

Even Stan, the character who in the book gave me psychotic lapses into existential dread brought about by boredom, is given stuff to do here, including that aforementioned fucking painting. However, Mike is still somewhat shortchanged, making it still "The Adventures of 6 Kids... And A Black One, I Guess", though it's not that jarring and makes sense. Still, I like Mike.

The child orgy is also removed, as is the Patrick Hockstetter sequence involving a fridge full of leeches, though Hockstetter himself is still here (presumably to make his cameo in "Firestarter" later...). One of those things is for the better, and I'll leave you to decide which.

In summary: A great story, a great adaptation, spooky and atmospheric throughout, terrifying in parts, embracing its source material with love and affection without being pandering; and making enough changes to keep it fresh and excellent.

Ben is still the best character.

PS The photograph sequence, the best, most frightening part of the trailer, is just as effective in the movie, and a lot longer, actually rising in tension.