"Hope" - Na-hong Jinvasion

A mauled cow, torn to ribbons, is discovered on the road at the outskirts of sleepy Korean farming village "Hope". Police chief Ko Bum-seok (Hawng Jun-min), shotgun in hand, goes to do his duty and investigate what may have done this, suspecting a tiger: the reality is far stranger, and he and the people of Hope are in for the worst day of their lives...

(Photograph: South China Morning Post)
Outrageous.
From Na Hong-jin, director of the phenomenal horror film "The Wailing" 10 years ago, the filmmaker has spent that interveneing time honing and concocting a unique cocktail of lunacy we don't see anymore, and which is a self-indulgent, sumptuous riot of a good time.
Beginning as a 45 minute chase sequence following the aftermath of a monster attack, building and crafting dread in a bombed out, ruined town reeling from the still current attack by an unknown entity, the film is breathless and tense and exciting and ever-escalating. When we finally see the monster, and rookie grenade-launcher sporting local cop Im Sung-ae (Jung Ho-yeon) arrives on scene, it becomes a glorious spectacle.
Then the movie has the audacity to keep going.
It takes a break from proceedings to have a genuinely tense monster autopsy interspersed with pitch black humour (I love the vet and would die for her), expands its scope to be something of an ensemble piece as locals reel from this madness and figure out what is going on, then puts pedal to the metal for an outstanding final act of impeccably white-knuckle chase sequences, bombastic lunacy and a woodland horseback gunfight with AK-47s, whilst still remembering to be funny and unpredictable and exciting. It never dragged for me even in its more self-indulgent moments of exposition (a story about a hunter is gleefully gross), and when the seemingly suicical and overconfident hunter Ko Sung-ki (Zo In-sung) takes centre stage, the film flips genres again to become a buddy cop madcap Looney Tunes adventure.
I miss when movies weren't afraid to be fun, to juggle genres and be about different things (I appreciate the recurring joke of asking where all of the guns came from and simply being given the answer: "I don't think that matters right now!").
Not since "The Host" have we had a daylight monster movie so good, and arguably not since that movie have we had a monster movie so enjoyable period.
The characters and performers are excellent (every monster is gangsta until Im Sung-ae shows up with a grenade launcher), the humour worked for me, and the monster design is uniformly creative and excellent, morphing between different forms and ideas with the same fluidity of the script. Its chases are truly outstanding pieces of cinema, and the bombed out town looks and feels excellent and pulsating, even in the midst of anarchy and chaos, idyllic peace shattered by this arrival. That the film still has the audacity to pepper in some neat social commentary (being close to the border of North Korea, some dissatisfaction with local civil servants, and more) is mere icing on the cake.
A wild time and well worth the wait.
Imagine you're at Cannes, expecting a drama in the vein of "Sentimental Value" and this menacing beast roars from the shadows, rears its head and pummels your expectations.
Hell yeah.

"Resident Evil" - Bryan Damage

Medical courier Bryan (Austin Abrams) is given a delivery of a valuable biological substance, likely an organ, with an urgent time frame, double pay and a snowy mountain road, heading for "Racoon City". His journey takes a rapid downturn...

(People)
Three for Three from horror maestro and "You done fucked up now!" Abraham Lincoln impersonator Zach Cregger!
After the incredible debut "Barbarian" and wild sophomore spookfest "Weapons", it was kind of disappointing to hear news that he would be tackling the horror video game with the shittiest writing of the industry, and as a videogame movie to boot! Look, we've had a relatively good hit rate this year for videogame movies ("Exit 8", "Mortal Kombat 2" which might be the best thing since sliced bread, and "Iron Lung") but this is still a game based on "Resident Evil"...
He nailed it.
It's a fun, very funny, movie akin to a point and click adventure game where our hapless put upon protagonist (a rather excellent Austin Abrams) stumbles through different environments simply attempting to survive with whatever objects he can scramble and assemble there, as ever-increasingly bizarre monsters threaten his face; all the while he gives us some actually pretty funny narration and quippy riffing on it all. He's a wiley and lovable, scrappy scamp just trying to get by, and we end up rooting for this poor bastard as things begin to spiral. The movie seems aware that "Resident Evil" is goofy and dumb, and plays with the tongue-in-cheek sensibilities of the one good game ("Resident Evil 4"), especially when Paul Walter Hauser (always a delight) shows up to steal the show for 10 minutes. There's a clever, wry recurring gag about indestructible padlocks (and the arbitrary, confined tunnel vision of door "puzzles" in these sorts of games) which pays off excellently, and it feels like a light-hearted love affair with the genre. It remembers never to be an outright comedy, keeping disgusting and unpredictable monsters thick and fast (sewer man and the one in the hospital are the best, you'll know when you see it, as it also got the biggest laugh from me when killed) whilst stretching its 15 rating for all it's worth. The film's monster design is excellent.
It's a riotous good time, and kind of what you expect from a blockbuster done by an excellent horror director. I was never bored.

The Van Dammeathon - "Kickboxer"

A cult classic, arguaby his best known film, and the time people started to celebrate Jean Claude Van Damme as a pop cultural icon and cult movie star in the making: "Kickboxer" is next on our JCVD movie star marathon! I remember having mixed thoughts about this one when I watched it on my second hand videotape years ago in a Swansea squat...
We're off to a good start, as this was another Canon joint! A vehicle for Van Damme as a leading man, with music by Stan Bush, here to capitalise and knock off "The Karate Kid" of all things, let's go!

(Thank you, Amazon)
Concept: Eric "The Eliminator" Sloane (Dennis Alexio) is a world champion boxer, seeking the latest challenge alongside his corner man, hype man, and brother Kurt Sloane (our boy Van Damme), the pair pictured here in the last image before they died in a tragic celluloid grain accident:

But when Eric is crippled in the ring by vicious Thai boxer Tong Po (Michel Qissi), a vengeful Kurt turns to an old Muay Thai master in the jungles, to better learn how to best this incredible foe...
It's every martial arts movie, and you knwo what? That simplicity works for Van Damme. If you're making a vehicle for a guy who kicks stuff: having it be a movie about a guy learning to kick stuff on a quest for vengeance is not a bad start, even if it is just "Bloodsport"... Concept: 4.
Execution!
Aha, but the devil is in the details!
These are the details:

It's a grainy, altogether rather duller affair, unfortunately. If you've seen a parody of a training montage for a sports movie, then you've seen this movie condensed. It's rather jarring getting Van Damme torture followed by an upbeat Stan Bush song.
CINEMATOGRAPHY!

I'll get to the largest tonal whiplash later on in another section.
Execution: 2
VILLAIN!
Here's the fun shit!

Michel Qissi plays Tong Po, the boxer whose job is to snarl, scream, kick stuff and cripple men with moustaches in the ring. As in, he cripples men who have moustaches, not with a moustache. That's the job of Julius Fuchs.
Tong Po does an excellent job in the martial arts and an admirable one in the feral ferocity of the part, the animalisticfury and crude brutality it requires. Unfortunately the makers decided that more than being an arrogant, brother crippling madman that in order for us to know that he was a villain, it was also required that he rape the token woman (and love interest of Van Damme, because of course she is) as well. No I am not going to show stills relating to it.
It's an otherwise really unpleasantly sour taste for what they're trying to go with for the villain, who is otherwise good. This may be controversial for such an iconic part in the Van Damme canon, but:
Villain: 2.
Sorry dude.
Charm!
Okay there is some otherwise goofy stuff we can enjoy, like that patented, non-trademarked Van Damme grin:

And then there is the best-known gif/moment of dancing and mayhem from the movie:

Hell yeah, that's the good shit.
Stan Bush also has a fun soundtrack, not on par with "Transformers" but still cheese-filled good times.
Charm: 3.
Score tally: 11 of 20
Bonus points:
1 for Grin.
1 for Michel Qissi, 1 for David Worth (co-director and cinematographer of "Bloodsport"), 1 for brotherhood (it's the plot) and then 1 for splits.
Final Score: 15.
A poor showing, unfortunately, despite its legendary status and cult following/credentials.

"Runner" - Kangaroo Jack Reacher

Burly large American man Hank Malone (Alan Ritchson) operates as a courier in Australia, getting the job done any way he can (usually by hugging door frames). His latest assignment is a simple one: escort a donor organ to its 7 year old recipient. Accompanying its chatty, gregarious and altogether too-friendly courier Bob Bishop (Owen Wilson), is the least of our stoic wall's problems, however, when armed attackers pull up and attempt to seize the liver for themselves...

(Angel.com)
Perfectly servicable fare for Ritchson, attempting to be "Midnight Run" or "The Rundown": giving the heavy lifting (hah) of the script to a motormouthed and likable enough Wilson, with a little more meat on the bones (hah) for Ritchson than he'd normally get. It's not as good as either of those movies, but trundles along well enough, though its tonal shifts are a tad jarring: in between its rather competent enough script (despite an underwritten twist villain in the final act) and a knock-down drag out Looney Tunes style final which makes the most of Ritchson being Big McLargehuge, there will be attempts at the witty rapport spliced with blood, guts and sudden deaths designed to tug at the hear strings. It feels like a Dolph Lundgren movie cosplaying as a late 2010s Statham movie, but it is solid enough as a rental.

"Leviticus" - Outback Mountain

Naim (Joe Bird) and his mother (Mia Wasikowska, I hate that she's now playing mothers, what IS time?!) move to a small community in Australia to be closer to the latter's church. When he falls for local scallywag Ryan (Stacy Clausen), the two end up at the hands of a local "faith healer" (Nicholas Hope, the titular "Bad Boy Bubby": I have watched way too many movies, and there are maybe about 6 actors in Australia) purged of their sins; only for both to to begin seeing a monstrous, murderous being which takes on the most terrifying form imaginable: each other.

(Credit: The Hollywood Reporter)
Reminiscent of "It Follows" in its wide shots and stylings, with the added touch of run down buildings and urban decay (as civilisation scars the landscape, uncaring of its natural beauty, out of place here and rotting despite its supposed familiarity and normalcy) reminding me of "Snowtown" and "Hounds of Love" in parts; the film has a bleak atmosphere and feels rather good. The two leads are excellent (Bird is on something of a tear between this and "Talk to Me"), and it does a good job conveying the premise and idea of forbidden love and tearing apart people with paranoia and driving a wedge between them. It maybe didn't need the clunky "it wants to drive a wedge between us!" from Clausen, but I'll let it slide as it's a debut. Honestly, after the monster arrives and the horror movie angle kicks in, it's not as good. It's fairly effective still (and Hope is always welcome), and the makers of the film have some fun with the paranoia angle, but the scares never really landed for me. It has neat touches of cinematography (like the brewing, ever evolving industry in the gorgeous background shots) but honestly worked better in execution as an insidious, nasty, skin crawling drama and horror of the kitchen sink variety at the start the Aussies do so well. It's still solid, with great performances and a phenomenally simple idea.

"Coyote VS Acme" - SLAAPstick Suit

Hungry genius Wile E Coyote (himself) suffers yet another catastrophe from the Acme Corporate products in his bid to capture the Road Runner (himself), and has had it. Spotting a billboard for low-stakes, case-settling small fry lawyer Kevin Avery (Will Forte), he launches a lawsuit against the Acme Corporation.

(Screen Rant)
A riotous good time, and a return to old school slapstick. Forte (the physical comedian of Saturday Night Live, and somewhat Marmite to many) does a good enough job here, understanding that he is in a Looney Tunes film and that his job is to play second fiddle to an excellent Wile Ethelbert Coyote in his amusing shenanigans. John Cena goes suitably cartoony as well, and matches what the movie is going for. It reminds me that I rather enjoy Wile E Coyote shorts, and some of the cameos are excellent deep cuts (it opens on an animated Peter Lorre, Gossamer shows up, and Pepe Le Pew got the biggest laugh in the cinema for his cameo), and the slapstick keeps the laughs coming. It's an endearing, amusing film which becomes a sweet ode to failure and efforts in its final act, and I appreciated the optimistic message. The censoring of the filthiest Run the Jewels song with Road Runner beeps is a joke so tailor-made for me that the cinema must have thought that I was mentally ill. Another win for art and Ketchup Entertainment (watch "Bushwick"). Fuck David Zaslav. Fuck Warner Brothers.

"I Want Your Sex" - Cowgirl and Aliens

Elliot (Cooper Hoffman) finally manages to land a job, as one of many assistants to the wealthy, successful modern artist Erika Tracey (Olivia Wilde), embarking on an odyssey of self discovery and artistic excess, which spirals into madness.

(Credit: Instagram)
I've always been hit and miss on Gregg Araki ("Mysterious Skin" is bleak stuff and I rather enjoy "Smiley Face" whilst it lasts, but "Doom Generation", "Kaboom" and "Totally Fucked Up" are misfires in my eyes) but for me this is the first of his films which works: a wild, colourful, poppy ride opening on a throwback to "Sunset Boulevard" and rattling on from there with cartoon segues, dream sequences and the satirical backdrop and colours akin to "Velvet Buzzsaw" as backdrops to a rather amusing counter-culture story about relationships, modern art and, yes, sex.
There's a funny threesome moment, and an always Viswanathan-style scene stealing performance from Mason Gooding as a camp sassy colleague of Elliot; and the film manages to wrangle Gregg Araki's eccentricities into a way which works: the pinball plot and free wheeling is in service of a wack-a-doodle energy and screwball comedy; characters do that thing in his movies where they stop and will rant at the audience, but here the rant is a discussion between Wilde and Hoffman about how sexual freedom is actually being reversed, and something I kind of agree with so will allow to slide. Wilde is on an absolute tear in this, and finally has parts worth sinking her teeth into, Hoffman is excellent; and the left-field "zeitgeist" casting choices had me giggling: Charli XCX is XCXcellent as the buttoned up and disinterested girlfriend, Johnny Knoxville plays a detective (I get to say that Charli XCX was in a Johnny Knoxville movie and that makes me so happy) alongside Araki regular Margaret Cho (James Duval also has a funny cameo at the end), whilst Chase Sui Wonders as roommate "Apple" has possibly the funniest aforementioned scene in the film; and the affair on the whole is a rollicking good time. Remember when movies had colour and joi de vivre? When the world needed Gregg Araki the most, he came back swinging.